Wednesday, November 19, 2008

back to the story

I wrote a short story to kick start the brain book. It was a template of sorts. These explorations have strayed away from my initial source. This is a good thing I believe. But it may be time to go back to the story and dig a little into what I was trying to achieve. My writing on this project is traveling at a snail's pace. It is true I am distracted. I am stuck in that weird limbo where my other project is still out in the world. I am waiting for some word about it, rather anxiously. I am also sending a story out to overseas markets. The brain book is a little ticking clock which is edging forward, one tiny sliver at a time. Christmas is coming. The busiest time of year at work. I remind myself that January will be a time for writing. I am using my time to think about the book, but I know I am squandering it. I need to put a whole day into it once a week. I need to start living at the state library or upstairs in the office where I can hang pictures and make index cards for the wall.

Next week can be a new beginning.I am starting the regime in so many ways. Riding my bicycle to work, making friday my writing/reading day, no sugar. I am changing my drink of choice back to vodka. Wine just makes me see the pointlessness of it all. Vodka makes me play. I am also committing myself to more reading. Forcing myself to finish an only average book helped me to find out more about my own abandoned work. I will push myself to reading time. My evenings are perfectly set up for this. Anthony can watch television. I can put the headphones on and read.

This does sound like a whole bunch of new year's resolutions that will never be met, but I have this blog to keep me honest and I have a book to write and I will never get it written unless I jump on my own back and ride myself mercilessly.

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